There are two words in the English language that, when used independently, I have no issue with. Used in sequence, however, they fill me with a near apocalyptic sense of dread. Skirt and weather. Skirt weather. Shudder.
If you’re like me and the idea of whipping out your lily white, inadequately toned gams sends you into a cold sweat, this is for you. Behold, my lazy girl’s guide to perfect pins. Fake it ‘til you make it, ladies.
Exfoliate
To avoid ingrown hairs, slough away ugly dry patches, and to allow an even application of any tanning products, you need a smooth, bump-free base. I’m a fan of a handy exfoliating mitt to keep mess at a minimum, like this one from Ecopure Bath.
Defuzz
Waxing is great, as it depilates AND exfoliates in one go. But waiting for your leg hair to grow can be torturous. So make the humble razor your friend. Shaving’s quick, easy and convenient, but make sure you follow a few simple rules.
Invest in a quality razor to avoid nicks and razor burn. I like the BIC Soleil Glow Disposable Razor, for its pretty pastel hues, and its trio of flexible blades and moisturising strip that ensure a clean, silky shave, every time.
Shave from the bottom up.
Leave your thighs to the waxing pros – the last thing you want to do is turn light, downy strands into thick, stubborn ropes.
Replace your razor every 5 – 10 uses, or as soon as it gets dull.
Keep your razor OUTSIDE the shower, as water will dull the blade faster.
Do NOT attempt a dry shave, no matter how lazy you are.
Use a cleansing shower oil
If you’re in a rush, or you just can’t be bothered applying a body lotion after showering, opt for a nourishing shower oil, rather than a moisture-stripping soap. Sebamed’s Cleansing Shower Oil perfectly matches the skin’s natural pH of 5.5, keeping the skin in balance and its protective barrier functioning. It’s also enriched with avocado oil to soften and hydrate. So you can skip the moisturiser and still have smooth pins. How is this real life?
Blitz cellulite & stretch marks
If you’re a fan of the mini skirt or short shorts, you’ll want to mimimise any signs of cellulite or stretch marks. Heck, I want to do that and I wear jeans 360 days of the year.
Babe Coffee Scrub is the lazy girl’s alternative to crash diets and scary sounding cosmetic ‘cures’. Containing a lush mix of coffee, sugar, Himalayan pink mineral salts, almond oil and essential oils, this dry scrub will hydrate, nourish, soften and stimulate, helping to blitz those booty bumps and fade those Mr Squiggles.
Tan
It’s a sad fact of life for us moon-tanners that legs just look better, and at least ten times less wobbly, with a little colour. If you don’t have time to make it to the salon, and don’t have eight hours to wait for your at-home product to dry, St. Tropez’s In Shower Gradual Tan is the business. You apply when WET, wait for three minutes, wash and go. Use for a few days and watch as you develop a natural-looking golden glow. Genius.
Shine bright like a diamond
Legs also look better with a bit of a shine to them. Nuxe's Huile Prodigieuse Shimmer Dry Oil is not only 98.8% natural, it smells the goods while it douses your legs in shimmering mineral particles AND nourishes and softens. And no, it’s not greasy.
Don’t forget the pedi
Now you have smooth, clear, golden, glowing legs, you’re ready to slip on that skirt and flash some flesh. Just don’t let the team down with shabby feet. Pop on a slick or two of a bright, summery polish – I like Kester Black’s 5-free vegan range – and some tan heels or wedges if you really want to lengthen those legs.